i was inspired by another thread to help with archie lovers conversion into cookie lovers...
MY INTENT for this thread is for us to come up with funny lessons for our imaginary class of new cookies, not for the lessons to be completed by dc.org posters. please help me in posting of assigments for this class...(can you tell im bored?)

students,

please turn your binders to page 7.

this is lesson one in Cookology 101. i will be your instructor, Dr. marlowe, also known on other threads as DJ marlowe. it is a requirement of this course that you download analogue heart, obtain a complete set of AI season 7, join dc.org and home of the word nerds, and purchase tickets for the AI concert. i realize the expense involved, but to get the most out of this course, it is a necessity. folks, do not hold back, this is your education at stake here.

our first lesson is on davids conversion of 70's songs into emo rock versions that are "molten hot lava bombs" please remember this term, it will be on the test.

your assignment is to review the following video and prepare a commetary. please break into groups of three for this. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UHo5I811n0k

your homework is to list 3 reasons david cook rocks and to review the following video and determine its relevance to the emotional connection between an artist and the audience. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jv8ktz-IbOU

good luck, class.

also, on a side note, even though i am your lead professor,some of my adjunct professors, members of dc.org, will be following my lead and posting future assignments for you as well. these may not be on your syllabus, but please treat them with the same urgency as you do assigments from me. these are my trusted colleagues in the field of cookology, so i respect their knowledge on the subject.

will see you tomorrow for our next lesson! (dr. marlowe)

***note to colleagues - please help me in posting assignments for this new class, as you know, our students are already behind in their knowledge and we have a lot of ground to cover***** thank you...

Great!! I love it!!

Assignment #2

Name pre-idol bands that David has been in.

class,
i have receieved your assignments from assignments one and two. thank you.
unfortunately, we do have a pop quiz today.

please get out your pencils. it will cover the TWIK performance.

what color was david's tie?
what guitar did he use?
finish the sentence.....by paula "you are standing in your _______"
why did simon say TWOK was the wrong song choice for david?
finish the lyric... have we the eyes to see....

our class work today will involve an epic phenomenon that has recently evolved this summer. it is a natural occurance that has mesmerized the female population...

any guesses, class?

correct! it is the MAVID DANCE!
lets have a look at this spectactular sight:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hKuprt8utes

class, i hope you respect the importance of this dance in history. you are very blessed to be living in the time of the MAVID DANCE.your class assignment is to write an essay on how the mavid dance could affect the history of our culture, our nation, and yes our world.

your homework assigment is to review the guitar hero video and 1) write a poem about how you are affected by it 2)list reasons why cook is your guitar hero 3)estimate how much revenue guitar hero will gain from this commercial
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5cOmBbdcHo...BA&index=39

thanks my attentive students! i look foward to my cookology colleagues posting some future assignments for you as well...
dr. marlowe
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the next lesson is my absolute favorite chapter in your book, Cookology:The Study of David Cooks Rise to Stardom. it is chapter 4 "David's Paleness"

your assigment is a research project.

please research the following...
1) what spf level does david use to maintain that milky white skin?

2) how does he avoid getting a tan?

3) compare davids paleness to those of his family members and determine the genetic linkage
to decipher which side of the family he inherits his wonderful paleness from

4)research fashion attire that david can wear to prevent him from getting a tan

5) construct a side by side comparison in photo shop of pale david and david with a tan, to illustrate why paleness rocks.

6)develop marketing project for davids own line of sunscreen called "To Promote Paleness", which will be
released later this year along with his album

i would also like for you develop a color chart displaying the different shades of pale that david likes to sport.

i truly believe that this assigment will utilize your various skills: artistic/creative, scientific/genetics, marketing, speculation/problem solving, and also some pop culture areas as with the fashion. as a result, this will be half of your grade...

and for lots of extra credit, please submit any pictures of pale david directly to me.

class, i am still looking foward to my colleagues helping me out with your assignments...
come on colleagues, any assignment ideas?

thanks to my colleage word_nerd_dc_rules5 for helping with assignments



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class,

toniight we will review chapter 8: David Cook: the fashion trendsetter.

i will review a few:

old trends that david has revived...
silicone bracelets
facial hair
spikey hair

new trends: (kinda)
writing on your hand
scarf in the back pocket
wrist bands/sweat bands
fedora
pointy boots
belt buckle off center
guyliner

also tonight we will review pre idol david in analogue heart:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lCBMcsD0Ao8...553&index=9

and searchlights:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nc9B0FZI2k4...53&index=14

your homework assigment: art portion: to make a paper mache replica of david and for the math portion of your assignment: calculate your predictions of his first week album sales, and the number of hours of sleep you think david has gotten since the finale

OMG!!!

I'd love to take this course... but I guess I already took it (and passed it with honors) LOL

Ha! These are hysterical. I can't come up with any as good as yours, but here are a few ideas to play with.
How about the number of hands he has had to shake, the number of smiles he has had to fake.
Bringing emotion back into style, being incredibly perfect about dealing with his fans, donating his time to raise money for cancer research, how to be a friend to younger idols, guesses as to when the single will come out.
Oops, my creativity is waning...

*cd hero, thank you! (i LOL the whole time i am writing these! - i am like, someone please LOL with me!)*

thank you to my colleage professor cdhero's suggestions for future assignments, i will be encorporating them into my lesson plan, and would like to invite professor cdhero to be a guest lecturer for one of our classes.

students,
i have some unfortunate news. in preparing for your next lengthy lesson, my computer was uncooperative and it was not saved. i am very dissapointed to tell you that due to the detailed nature of the next lesson and assignment and the fact that it will have to be recreated, that it will not be completed in a timely manner. please enjoy a break from your lessons. it is well deserved.

i feel like you will all be well rounded individuals after completing this course. because, as you may have observed, it focuses on a wide variety of areas including art, fashion, marketing, phsycology, science, math, music production/appreciation. i also plan to incorporate anthropology and sociology in upcoming assignments.

you are all on your way to a degree in cookology and i am very proud...

dr. marlowe

OMG I LOVE THIS !

professor widz,
so glad you are enjoying my class, could i sign you up for a guest lecture spot in my class? my students would love to hear another perspective on cookology. i will be in a faculty meeting until late, so just let me know the topic you would like to speak on...

also, please encourage our other colleagues on dc.org to sign up for guest spots. be sure to leave me significant detail about the topic you will be speaking on. i must excuse myself, my secretary tells me that is the president of the university on hold for me...(feel free to contact me during my office hours).
dr. marlowe

*(i am LAUGHING OUT LOUD SOOOOOO MUCH HERE!)*

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Mely,

i did check your transcripts and cookology 101 was there. and i am so proud to say that you did pass with flying colors. an excellent gpa you acheived (4.0). i remember you from my class and all the great class participation you initiated. you always had great things to say about cookology. i hope your degree is serving you well. perhaps you would speak to my class, as a former student, it would be such an honor for my class to see the success that your cookology degree has given you. come to my office and we can set up a time...

excuse, a freshman is at the door to check on his grade,

professor marlowe

This is such a fun thread! When it's completed, someone should print it out and give it to DC at an event. I think he'd get a good laugh, too.

I think you should do a thorough review of DC hairstyles and facial hair and relate them to periods in DC's music. Then follow the evolution of DC on the show in hair, beard and music. And you haven't touched spelling review with all his fancy words.

professor meg,

these are excellent points you make. i will definitely add them to my curriculum. it is so important that we dont miss any of the details. our students need all the info they can get. you know, professor meg, your points are such a fresh perspective, i am not sure that they are even in our textbook.. thank you so much!

excuse me, that is the board of regents on the phone, i have to take that. and the admissions counselor is waiting in the waiting room. whew! it is a busy schedule being a professor of cookology! i am going to ask the dean to add some adjunct professors next year. maybe by then i will have tenure...

professor marlowe


meg,
i cant get pictures to post! only video - can you do a hairstyle/facial hair review for me with posted pics? or someone? how could i leave out spelling?? *runs to lesson plan to update**

Your welcome!

Cool! Work that I acctually might enjoy doing!

Ah he** no! LMAOROTF!!!

OMG...I am laughing so hard I have tears!!

Girl, you are too much...I love you to pieces friend!!

I am so emailing this thread link to the professor friend in Michigan (I mentioned her to you before
Marlowe).

Cookologists are a brainy bunch

Here are some more observations (1000+) as to David and his greatness found on this site:

http://www.davidcooktheamericanidol.com/301-reasons-why/

and try this page too, from the same site (it's where I met the Michigan prof.):

http://www.davidcooktheamericanidol.com/sat-challenge/

Marlowe, I'm loving this thread! I bet David laughed his butt off when he read this (and probably cried a little too).

glad you stopped by for a class!